Okay - I’ve finally transcribed all the notes from all the sessions into the blog - reading back over them, there is much to expand upon (and some things just flat out won’t make sense until I do). This was easily one of the most mind-expanding and convicting events I’ve taken part in. God used this Symposium to free me from a number of sacred cows and suppositions that had been holding me back as an artist.

My wife and I had a beautiful conversation today about art. I have been struggling very much with my role as an artist because there is always so much that I want to do that I have a hard time focusing and, due to my aforementioned predilection to avoid anything that takes much effort, I was having a very hard time processing much of the information from the symposium as an artist. So, I asked her what artistic elements did she see she’s seen in me over the years (we’ve been married for almost 17 years now - she knows me pretty well). She shared with me three specific areas where she sees me as an artist. I want to share these with you for the sake of accountability and because they say a good bit about me.

  1. Singing - I’ve been singing since I was a child. I’ve always loved to sing, but she reminded me that beyond just having a good voice that I am able to carry emotion in my voice and it comes through in the singing. I had not thought about that fact really. God has granted me a creativity in the way I vocalize certain lines of a song. She reminded me that I am always trying to find the right voice to interpret a melody and that I’m always trying to stretch myself and find new ways to express what I believe the song says.
  2. Guitar - she reminded me that the guitar came very naturally for me. I do not have a great respect for my [lack of] mastery of the this instrument, but I have honestly not spent that much time actually honing my craft. What I do know, I picked up quickly by God’s grace and I still work hard to interpret chord patterns to find my own rhythm and strum pattern in the song so that I it matches itself to the way I feel it should be sung. There is much to learn here and I have a disgusting tendency to go with what I know and don’t push myself nearly enough… but that is something that can change.
  3. Writing - I absolutely love to write. I’ve always loved to write - I haven’t read near enough to know what good writing really is and I do not have the illusion of how well I write now… but I know how much I love it and that I don’t completely suck at it. This is something that I’ve spent very little time cultivating - while I have no illusion or desire to that I might become the next Steinbeck or Dickens [(nor do I desire it)], I do want to write well.

I thank God for my wife who could with great honesty and without having to even think that hard drew out these three things that became incredibly obvious to me once she reminded me. Husbands - we really need to ask our wives what they think our strengths are without fear of what they might say. Wives - when your husband asks you this question - think of the courage that it takes just to ask the question.

The conversation was, of course, a two-way conversation, and I told her what I saw in her and it was a wonderful conversation for us both… but I would need to ask her before I began to discuss her artistry in this blog. She’s an amazing artist and her creativity is something that I hope to be able to share with you as she creates new artwork to share with the community of faith.

That said, my commitment is to do the same. I will continue to blog about what God is doing in my life in these areas and I hope to share with you some songs and some writings that God gives me. Some of them will really suck… but that’s okay. You can’t create anything great if you are unwilling to create risk creating something you hate as well.