Well, I promised myself that when I lost the first 10+ pounds, I would give myself a reward. Jana (my wife) and I talked it over and she graciously agreed that the reward for me would be 4-6 hours all by my lonesome to go wherever I want and just be. So, here I am at Scooters, listening the Randy Pausch lecture (47-year old scientist who gave a “Last Lecture” before he died), eating a Panini and drinking an iced white mocha. While this may seem a simple pleasure… it’s been (just an hour in) a great and peaceful time of reward.
What I will do after this is uncertain. I have no master plan… and, no, I don’t particularly plan to accomplish any item on The List of Great Things I Must Accomplish.
As I sit here in a semi-full coffee shop with headphones on listening to a man who only had 2-5 months to live talk about childhood dreams, I can’t help but wonder why this is the thing I’ve chosen to enjoy as a “reward” for accomplishing more weight loss than I’d experienced in a while. Does this reinforce poserdom? Should my dream be more spiritual… more worthy of a super mondo cool blog post the that inspires the masses (heh – like there are masses) to go out and build amazing dreams?
Well, as I’ve been pondering this, only one word comes to mind… Sabbath. Why have I so longed for this time away? Why do I now feel such a surge of satisfaction sitting here alone? I never sabbath. Now, if you read my time post, this can’t be a surprise (or the inference of the comment above regarding The List of Great Things I Must Accomplish). I’m pretty sure I’m not alone… especially among my PoMo geeky fellow-planters.
There is a lesson here – it’s so obvious that I hesitate to say it… so I won’t. At least not right now.
Hopefully, you see in these writings a man who is staying The Course and pursuing The Path amidst the pitfalls and selfish ways of being a son of Adam. I pray earnestly that my writing would encourage some of you by showing you that this journey - though arduous and sometimes tragic - is a journey of great satisfaction. A satisfaction greater than our greatest imaginings. The trials and refining fire of tribulation are to be recognized as a small shadow of the suffering of our Savior so that we can rejoice, as Peter and the disciples did, to be counted worthy to suffer for the sake of the Name.